More from "Save a whale, harpoon a fat chick!"

Oh my God. Am I really going to do this. What do I do with the ton of lycra on my thighs and butt? I cant let him put his hands on my thighs and feel the jingle-guard granny panties. Think. think. Think. The bathroom! That's it! I'll push him off of me and say I have to pee.
He was so hungry for me. His kisses were like attatcks on my lips and his hands were starting to roam towards my waist. Panic mode set in. I took a deep breath and shoved him off as hard as I could.
"Am I going to fast? I'm so sorry." He looked so confused. I felt sorry for him. He was genuinely concerned for my readiness. He on the other hand was pitching a tent that could have housed an entire barrack of soldiers and there were no concerns on my end about his readiness.
"Everything is fine, I just have to go to the bathroom." I smiled and acted as shy as I could. I wanted to embarrass him into not asking anymore questions. I have found that anything to do with the female anatomy doing anything other than fornication was an instant lock-jawed subject with teenage boys.
"Oh, ok. Its through that door next to the closet." He pointed.
I jumped up from the bed and plowed through the door. I turned around and leaned against it to catch my breath. I stripped off the girdle as fast as I could. It was more like a coat of armor for my butt and thighs. It sucked in everything. I was still chubby when I wore it, but at least nothing jiggled when I walked.

I didnt want to throw it in the garbage can and I couldnt flush it.
I know! I thought. Under the sink! That way, it'll still be there when I come back to freshen up. "I am a freaking genius" I beamed to myself. I went to grab for the cabinet but there was some sort of lock on the knob. It connected to the side. I pulled hard and it finally popped off. I hastily tossed my girdle in and shut the cabinet door but not before I caught a whiff of the sweet sour smell of ass and sweat coming from it. When did I last wash thing thing? I honestly couldnt remember. The lock was now broken and the door wouldnt close all the way. Well, i'll just come in here before he does i said to myself.

I opened the bathroom door slowly and started over to the bed. He was laying on his back with his arms folded and his hands under his head. The only thing he had on was his white tube socks. I gasped and turned my head shyly away as I ran over to the bed. He didnt say a word as I laid down beside him. He rolled over on top of me, cupped my chin in his hand and kissed me deeply. I closed my eyes and drank in his scent. It was a mixture of maleness, earth and ass? What in the world? My eyes flew open as something wet and cold nudged my cheek. A little cry escaped my throat. We both looked over and saw his Black Lab Jeb's head resting on the edge of the bed with my girdle in his mouth. Now I know why those childproof locks were on the cabinet under his sink.