My life is over. Time has officially left my side. Its left me stranded in grown up land. I found something last night. Something to awful for me to even say. I cant tell you but I have to.
I found a man hair under my chin. There I said it. I FOUND A MAN HAIR ON MY CHIN!!
What does this mean? Am I suddenly going to start sprouting chest hair and back hair too? Oh please say it isnt so. Does this mean that I have to walk around spitting loogies and chugging beer while scratching my ass? If I ever do these things and then sniff my fingers please shoot me. Just put this old dog down.
The worst part is that it wasnt just one man hair. It was cluster of them. About 4 all crowded together giggling at me and pointing and smirking. I plucked them. That'll teach them to show up in the land of woman. Yeah, Yeah! Chigga-chigga-what-what!!
I say bring it on man hair. I got a new set of revlon tweezers and by golly I know how to use them.
If these start coming out of my nose or ears, please shoot me over that too.
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