Day-171 Queens and their bees

I've given my oldest son (the one I call Number 1) a new nick name. I'm going to start calling him L.L. Cool D.
Ladies love cool Dylan. While we were on our Fathers Day vacation I noticed all the little girls were swarming him. Granted there were only 3 but hey, 3 is enough to equal a swarm in the "Queen Bee" of girl standards.

Now, what my son didnt realize is that girls stick together. They roam in packs and have little honed in instincts to let them know when one another is in trouble. Kinda like, cramping but it can happen at anytime one of their swarm is in trouble. Here's where trouble started. Piggyback rides.


And here's where my son went wrong. He started a stick fight with the Queen.


Uh-oh! The cramping kicked in and here comes one! Run Number 1 Run!


Um, where in the world did the third one come from? Its like she popped right out of thin air. See how dangerous those female creatures are Number 1?


And this is how it ended. Scary little things arent they?


See Number 1, when you mess with the uterus you get the ovaries too. There is nothing more dangerous than something mad and full of estrogen.

day 1 hundred and something or other...

Just a few shots from the Fathers Day vacation that we took. :)

I just want to put a formal happy fathers day out to my husband Spanky for without me, your day would not be possible :)













and my personal favorite. The act of actually "becoming" a father.

Day 161-The Big HURT

Talk about commitment on a play. This is my 11 year old taking a dive trying to catch a foul ball at his game tonight.



While I was snapping my child in pain and reeling on the ground after he planted his entire body weight on his wrists I thought, hmmmm, am I getting the best angle for this shot? Would it be covered best from the side? But then of course I would have missed his facial expression which to me, sums up the feelings of every single player from tonights game.



Dont worry. AFter I finished taking a succession of shots of this particular play I realized that he just might be hurt a little bit and I put the camera down and walked over to make sure he was alright. Of course, he was. He's a tough kid. Takes a lickin' and keeps on tickin'.

No 11 year olds were harmed in the shooting of this photo and no I didnt tell him to dive for a ball so that I could post a really cool action shot on my blog. What do you think I am folks? A meanie? *GASP* Well I NEVER.

Day 159-Dog Butchering 101

So I was bored this weekend and decided to try out a new profession. Photography isn't enough for me. I had to try out dog grooming. I decided to try it out on my pomeranian. I decided that she was to hot under her huge fluffy coat and it needed to come off for the summer. I mean seriously, who wants to run around with a huge ball of frizz all over their body when its 105 degrees. Besides, Steve Correl people. Stay with me here.

Anyhow, I picked up some $25 pet clippers and went to down when we got home. Fur was flying, my girl was trying to run away. I had her tucked under one arm and the clippers in the other. Well the clippers weren't cutting through her hair to well so I decided to take the scissors to it first. I chopped away all the hair I could get my hands on. I may have puked a hair ball. I'm not admitting to anything.

My end result is a pomeranian with a butchered coat. I am to embarrassed to even take her to the groomers because I know they'll cackle and laugh at me when I leave. They'll talk about how people are stupid to think that they can do something like this on their own and they should leave it to the professionals and guess what. I couldnt agree MORE. They'll rush home to their families to tell them all about the poor little dog that came in with the mentally ill mom that tried to make her look like a chiuahuah.

Here is my beautiful girl before.



And here are a few of my poor girl after. Dont judge me before you walk a mile in my Crocs.







I have learned in my life to leave dog grooming, cable and septic system installation to the professionals.

If anyone knows a good groomer that will not laugh at me too much and take pity on my poor girl please let me know. I'm going to go eat lots of spongy cake and possibly a whole side of beef. Maybe both together. I'm not sure yet. I've depressed myself looking at these pics.

DAY 154-THANKS FAUQUIER GATORS!!

My boys got to meet a wonderful group of guys tonight. The Fauquier Gators gave them a few tips on pitching and batting. It was a great experience for the boys and so great of the Gators to do that for the boys. My boys have decided that their signed Gator posters are the most prized posession of their lives. I think you guys might even rank higher than the PSP's and Wii's. Okay maybe not THAT much but a lot.





I only snapped a few pics because I didnt want to embarass my guys by running behind them snapping all of their life moments for the hour they were on the field with them. Seriously, do you guys have ANY idea how hard it is for a photographer to restrain from snapping the shutter through moments like this? I think I popped a vein with all my self control. I had to treat myself to a Pina Colada ice pop when we got home to calm the frazzled photographer OCD I have.

Its official. I have ruined my kids for picture taking for the rest of their life. Its sad. I mean, what kind of mom would I be if I didnt have pictures of my oldest riding his hobby horse in nothing but a pair of power ranger underoos while sporting yellow rainboots?



Oh, and I apologize for not keeping this a true day to day account of my life in pictures. Its also official that I am a failure. *sigh* At least I still have my spongy cake :)

Day 149-"Hair" Today, Ghosts Tonight?

Well I havent brushed my dog in like 2 weeks. Now, to someone with a regular coated dog would thing, geez, I havent brushed my dog like, ever.

That would be fine and dandy but Spanky bought me a pomeranian for my birthday and well, the girls packing major folicles. And OMG my parrot just screamed at something in the dark. I totally think we have ghosts. I think I just peed my pants. Yep, I totally tinkled myself a little. Whew, my adrenaline is pumping and I'm scared to turn around. I think I'm being haunted by the ghost of Jim Carey. Oh wait, he's not dead yet. Well can I "hope" I'm being haunted by the ghost of the young hot Elvis? Okay seriously, you cant deny the dude had moves in the younger years.

Oh yes, moving back to subject of the blog. My girls Bells is getting shaved down. And OMG I just heard knocking over in the kitchen. Like someone was knocking on my cabinet or something. Okay seriously, I'm not interested in the Elvis ghost anymore lol. You can go now. No seriously, your nothing but a hound dog. OMG-cold breeze over my shoulder. Oh wait, thats just me breathing.

Anyhow, I'm just gonna show you how much hair I brushed off of her. Now, this is JUST from a brushing. Well like a 30 minute brushing but a brushing none the less. I had her hair up my nose. I had it entwined with my own hair when I went to pull it up. I think I might be able to make a wig out of what I brushed off of her.

Hmmm, a new business venture? Pomeranian Puffs? I can put them in little buns and people can wear them princess Leia style or little old ladies can wear them to church .

GONE GREEN!!

I am very excited to announce that Melissa Dawn Photography is now green! All session agreements, wedding contracts and payment info is now all electronic!

I have been working on this for a while and its great to finally see it live.

DAY 147-BIGGER IS BETTER

When it comes to fish that is. Okay, well lets face it. Bigger is better when it comes to alot of things like lenses, and butts oh and boobs. Wait no, thats only what my husband Spanky says.

Heres his catch of the day from yesterday. Its a 23" long catfish. He'll be eatin' good in the neighborhood.

Day 140-Happy Birthday Number 1!!

Meet my number 1. My number 1 turned 11 today. Wow! Seriously, when in the world did that happen?

Number 1 has always been a guiding light for me. He is strong, considerate, patient and loving. He's a straight A guy who LOVES his sports. He will always be my baby no matter how old he gets.

He puts up with my childish behavior. He laughs at my dorky jokes and always tells me I rock.

He's just such a great kid. I am so blessed that God saw fit to give me such an blessing for my first child.

However there are a few things that I feel I should apologize for. Please dont judge me until you walk a mile in my saggy bra. Here goes.

I'm sorry I made all my mistakes with you number 1. I'm sorry for all the times I dropped you. Oh and I'm sorry for strapping you to the hood when we didnt have room in the car when you were first born.

Kidding!! I'm kidding people lmaoo

Day 135-have you seen my thingy?

this was my anniversary gift from Spanky. Its a barrel to burn things in. He said look we can sit outside and stay warm by the fire in the evenings now. it says scotty n missy 4-15-00. those boobs are supposed to be zero's but he cut the holes to small lol um, thanks? no really it was very sweet. good job hun :)

133-WEEEEEEEE DOGGIES!!

Hmmmm, what do you do when its rained for 3 days straight, flooded in your county and everything is canceled including school and work?

Well ya go mud boggin' of course! In the backyard no less. Of course our backyard is a forest with lots of trails cut into it by Spanky because "you need to be prepared for when it might rain real good like." Well it did just that this weekend and yesterday.

So heres a few pics of the dirty, muddy afternoon we had in the backyard with the boys :) Spankys truck is way to tall for me to step up into. When I stand next to it the floorboard is at my waist. Yesterday was the first time since he's bought it that I have ever ridden in it. He had to stack cinder blocks for me so that I could climb up into it. Yes, I admit thats redneck. Lord have mercy is that redneck. Help me Tom Cruise!

Day 128-Luna Moth

I came home from dropping the boys off at the bus stop this morning and was greeted by this beautiful specimen of nature.

Its called a "Luna Moth". They're not normally seen especially during daylight hours. If you have been graced by the presence of this work of art from mother nature consider yourself in the club with the lucky few. I have a connection with this Luna Moth that goes beyond photographer and subject. It ties in with a very strange and vivid dream I had last night. I feel cosmically entwined with it. Its a long story. Maybe I'll tell ya sometime.

The Luna Moth represents the beauty, brevity, and complexity of life. But, most importantly, transformation. I think, No, I KNOW something big is coming and I am in the path of it. I can feel it in every fiber of my being. Its like there are sparks in the air. My soul is being awakened and everything is becoming clearer.

I'm paying especially close attention to the signs around me.

Day 126-Describe yourself on 2"x3"

Well this is me. This is my work. In a nutshell. Its so hard to try and define yourself on such a small canvas. Anyhow, these are the new biz cards coming next week :)

p.s. Sorry about all the watermarking. There has been a string of burglaries in the artistic community. Apparently STUPID people are STEALING images of other artists and using them for their own. Seriously people, how in the hell can you sleep at night knowing that your showcasing something thats not yours. All I have to say to you is, Karma baby. When she comes back around, she's a real bitch.

Day 121-My Girls

I'm SUPER-DEE-DUPER busy this weekend. I'm not gonna be around till Sunday or Monday but I didnt want to leave you without a weekend blog to pick your nose at. Make sure you click on the pics to make them larger so you can see the text. Its titilating and might make your hiney perk up and tingle.

My girls are two very hairy ladies of the canine persuasion. Sometimes they're as close as the closest human sisters. Sometimes they fight just like human sisters. I recently photographed one of their I love you/I hate you moments. Bells is the blond and Dixie is the beagle or as I like to call her, "the ugly sister". Kidding. I'm kidding lol



I heard them talking to each other. This is what they said.



And heres where the fur starts to fly......




Oh no she di'int!



That bitch is going down!



Pull her hair! Pull her hair!


Suckers. Hey that wasnt the boys undies it was mine. Thanks for chewing the butt out of my favorite pair ya skank.

Day 120-Some things never change.

Some things, well, they never change. Do you think men will EVER stop marking their territories?

Some things, they just never change.

Day 119-I didnt forget your birthday.

I didnt forget your birthday.
I remembered it.
I celebrated it with you but you weren't there.
But I didnt forget your birthday.
I made you a cake but I had to eat it alone.
It was sweet.
But I didnt forget your birthday.
I smiled when I thought of you happy.
It made me cry.
But I didnt forget your birthday.
I celebrated it with you but you weren't there.
I didnt forget your birthday.

Day 117-Wheres Waldo?

Wheres Waldo?

Lets see. Waldo has been lost for about a week. Omg do you guys hate me? I am so sorry for leaving all 4 of my stalkerazzi's out there to try and find their daily fix of crazy somewhere else. Hopefully you all still love me and can forgive a sistah whos been swamped, puking, cleaning up puke, swamped and cleaning up more puke. Did you know your dogs can get the flu? Um, yeah, so not pretty. I think I've learned what its like to live in hell.

Okay so heres the rundown for a few things that have been going down the last week or so. I went on a field trip with Cheeky. This is the new name I'm gonna use to refer to my 8 year old. We learned about where our steak comes from. Yes, the farmer actually pointed to specific parts of the steer that was standing eating in front of us and correlated it to what goes on the plate. The kids were crying and gagging. I was slobbering all over myself. Hey, I love rare steak. Just wipe its ass and throw it on a plate. If its still moo'ing then pass me a gag ball.

We learned about bugs we can find in the water. Yeah, I'm not swimming in the river anytime soon. Oh, and my favorite part of the ENTIRE trip was when I learned how to identify a hickory nut by the hottest forester worker I have ever seen. I have a new love for all things wood.

Oh and we went to "Headsucking '08". It was a crawdad fest thing. Basically I paid 30 bucks a person to eat some crawdads and watch Spanky get plastered beyond recognition. Thats not a story. The dude drank so much that he puked and laid down in it and refused to get up. He somehow managed to crawl onto the back of his brothers pick-up and when we got home, I left him out there. In the rain. Drunk. No covers. Yeah, slow your role fool. Learn your limit. I still love you though you ass. I cant stay mad at'cha for long.



My sisters and I have also decided that no matter how long we been married. No matter how many kids we have, we will always be D.G.4.L.'s. DIRTY GIRLS 4 LIFE. I had to protect one of my younger sisters from being hit on by all the dorks at what we now refer to as "Redneck Woodstock" so I pretended to be her girlfriend for the night. We called it Redneck Woodstock because it POURED for about an hour and everything was muddy so we were all barefoot. Only my baby sister was pregnant so she totally fit into that cliche. Barefoot and pregnant at the Redneck Woodstock. Lmao-I love you girl!!!



I also learned that I can drink a soda with my boobs. Its the coolest party trick EVER.

DAY 110

I love lilacs. They're not my favorite flower to look at but they're my favorite to smell. Its smells like spring ;)

Day 107-Clue Number One

The first clue to knowing your third baser is going to have a long game is when they're "sky watching" while the other team is batting.

The second clue to knowing its going to be a long game is when your third baser downs 2 full 16oz bottles of water in a matter of 7 minutes.

The final clue that its time to take your third baser home is when he blows chunks all over the inside of the dugout.

I do believe this was one of those days when I could have done without leaving the house but hey, I'm breathing so I cant complain...Much.

Calgon-take me AWAY!

Day 105-Passion

Could you do what Christopher Mccandless did? Could you give up everything to live free? I wish I could feel the true passion for living as he did.

This is my new favorite song. It moves me. The lyrics bring me to my knees and yet I cant seem to stop hitting the replay button.

DAY 104-I LOVE YOU MORE

I knew that the boy sitting on the stool next to me was the love of my life when he cut out the heart of our pig fetus we were dissecting in biology class.

He did all the work. He never made me touch it all. I remember watching him crack the chest of our little pig and thinking about how sweet he was and how adorable his dimples were when he smiled at me. Even now, the smell of formaldehyde brings back those goose bumps of a first real love.

I had to have this boy. I was seeing someone and so was he but I didnt care. I dumped my loser boyfriend and about a week later he was "mysteriously" not dating anyone anymore. We would spend hours on the phone. I'm talking 5-6 hours at a time until we were both falling asleep or the phones batteries started dying. We were inseparable for years.

Still, 12 years later, 8 years of marriage and 3 babies he still melts me with his dimples when he smiles. I could probably do without the hairy hiney that came out of nowhere 5 years into the relationship but hey, no ones perfect. How boring would that be :) So this ones for you babe. Look how far we've come.....

DAY 100-BOW CHICKA WOW-WOW!!!

So I havent really been doing the best job with posting a photo a day. I'm trying REALLY hard people. I swear. I'm sacrificing valuable me time to be here with you all. I could be like, washing my hair, or underwear or something. But no, I love you all so much (all 4 of you) that I forgo the silkiness of my blond tresses just to post for you all. Cause I love you. All of you. All 4 of you.

So today this post is about you. The wonderful fans. This is for you "C" from SoCal. You know who you are. You make me happy when skies are gray. You scare me a little bit too but thats okay-we're working through it. So come on yall! Lets see your best "ode to missy" photos or drawings or whatever you want to do. Make a wonderful mold out of doggie doodie

I love you too my happy little stalker!!!

DAY 98-I know my dog is gay

I know my dog is gay. Do you know how I know my dog is gay? Because she craps rainbows out of her butt. Thats how I know my dog is gay.